Crush Liberalism

The year 2029

This is a humorous e-mail sent to me by a relative, but it provides some great political satire.

* Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.

* Baby conceived naturally . . . scientists stumped.

* Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

* Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

* France pleads for global help after being over taken by Jamaica.

* Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

* George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

* Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

* 85-year, $75.8 billion federal government study results: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

* Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

* Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

* New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.

* Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.

* IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

And last but certainly not the least… (I love it)..

* Florida Democrats still don’t know how to use a voting machine.

January 27, 2005 - Posted by crushliberalism | Uncategorized