Crush Liberalism

Did man off himself due to insults on blogs?

Wow.  If I thought about taking myself out due to something negative I read about me on this (or other) blogs, I’d have been dead a long time ago.  If every person in the blogosphere I insulted wound up checking themselves out of the gene pool because of something I wrote, I’d be a cyber serial killer.  Fortunately (or, for you moonbats, unfortunately), I don’t give enough of a wet fart on a dry January Monday what people outside of my circle of friends and family think about me…and I’m guessing the reverse is true, too.

This, however, is a story with a sad ending.  From the NY Post:

No one seems to know why Paul Tilley, the 40-year-old creative chief of ad agency DDB Chicago, jumped to his death from the window of the Fairmont Hotel in Chicago on Friday.

But that hasn’t stopped a barrage of finger pointing on several advertising blogs at the center of a controversy about what role, if any, they played in Tilley’s suicide.

Most of the anger appears to be directed at two sites – Agency Spy and Adscam – that subjected Tilley to scrutiny leading up to his death. Both bloggers defended their coverage yesterday.

“I see in the comments of this post that many will point fingers at this blog for Mr. Tilley’s death. That is unacceptable,” Agency Spy wrote in a posting.

The defense was in response to readers who blamed the public scrutiny and “snarky” comments for driving Tilley over the edge or – at least – contributing to the pressure-cooker atmosphere in the ad industry.   (Death by “snark”? – Ed.)

One commentator wrote on AgencySpy: “Trust me… as someone who’s known Paul for over 20 years… he heard and felt all those comments and whispers.”

The controversy reached the upper echelons of the ad agency world, when Nina DiSesa, the chairman of McCann Erickson New York, jumped in to complain about the blogs.

“These hateful advertising blogs seem to be written by people who are bitter about the business,” DiSesa wrote on AgenCySpy.

Although AgencySpy doesn’t disclose its blogger, George Parker, a veteran ad executive, writes AdScam.

“I suggest anyone who still feels pissed off at me and Agency Spy should contact DDB Chicago,” Parker wrote on his blog yesterday. “They know why he committed suicide. And it didn’t have anything to do with what he read on a blog.”

Both blogs drew on internal memos Tilley had sent around the agency to critique his management style, with one calling him “demoralizing” and suggesting he take lessons in motivational speaking.

Tilley, who is survived by his wife and two children, fell from the Fairmont Hotel next door to DDB. Colleagues said he gave no signs of being depressed, although he took a couple of personal days on Thursday and Friday.

Rick Carpenter, the CEO of DDB Chicago, said Tilley’s job was secure and he seemed happy after a big client presentation went well on Wednesday.

I’m not just saying this because I run a blog, but this has to be said: I cannot and will not assume responsibility for someone else’s mental instability.

A friend of mine in the early 1990′s was dating a girl who wanted to get married (despite the fact that they had only been dating for a couple of months!).  He rejected the idea, then decided to stop dating her.  She got a little “Fatal Attraction” on him, driving by his work (he worked the graveyard shift, but she didn’t), calling his house (and hanging up…this was before caller ID) in the middle of the night when he wasn’t working, etc.  She finally got a hold of him and threatened to kill herself if he didn’t take her back.  He was upset at first, but then he finally realized that her being a nutbar was not his fault.  He told her that while he didn’t want her to do it, he couldn’t stop her and her death would be in vain, since he had moved on from her anyway.  She didn’t do it, just to “spite” him.

A different friend of mine left her addict husband, who drove down to the parking lot of the church where they got married, and he blew his brains out.  She suffered intense guilt and depression from that, but eventually, she recovered and remarried and is now happy with life.  He, however, is still dead.

The point is this: disturbed people cannnot hold anyone “emotionally hostage” by killing themselves in the hopes of inflicting guilt-ridden anguish on others.  Yes, it sometimes does work, but only temporarily.  Ultimately, the guilt and anguish goes away…and the disturbed is still dead.  Why give anyone that kind of emotional power over you?

These blogs that were unkind to Tilley were not responsible for his death, as he clearly had issues that went way beyond the blogosphere.

March 3, 2008 - Posted by crushliberalism | non-political